Author: samantha

High Street & Amazon Beauty & Fashion Buys – Hits & Misses

On By samanthaIn HEALTHLeave a comment

It’s a sunny Saturday and my daughter and I head into London as she wants to buy some clothes for an upcoming trip she’s making to Milan with some of her university friends. We go to Regent Street which is about a two minute walk from where my daughter is working as an intern. My daughter isn’t the most confident clothes shopper, although she is finding her own style, so wanted to bring me along rather than shop by herself in her five minute lunch break. She is twenty one and athletic, in other words she looks annoyingly good in everything. We went into Hollister and I spotted this oversized striped linen shirt for £29.95 and bought it (for myself) while my daughter tried on a selection of tiny clothing. We then went into Uniqlo where she found some really nice tailored shorts and I bought a black maxi skirt for £34.90. I was tempted by a similar style dress instead but I find I seldom wear the dresses I already own, a skirt is more versatile. I have a few Marks and Spencer classic fit T shirts and will probably wear it with one of those.

We then went into Zara where my daughter looked at vest tops. I bought a bottle of their Radiant Vanilla fragrance. They had a whole range of similar vanilla scents priced at £17.99. I am pleased with this impulse buy, it doesn’t give me a migraine which is always a good start.

When we got home I realised that I hadn’t bought any casual trousers so I ordered these apricot coloured wide leg trousers. from ASOS. If you read my post Wide Leg Woes you might remember that I struggle with anything other than skinny jeans. Anyway, I love these, they fit perfectly, but was extremely irked when they reduced in price by £20 the day after I bought them.

Possibly the most exciting thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life is that I have been invited to join Amazon’s Vine programme. I can order up to three items a day, with no cost to me, as long as I write a review. I was beyond thrilled when I received the invitation email and immediately logged on to my account to choose my first items. So, it’s fair to say that I was a little disappointed at the selection. Tattoo moisturiser and silky bonnets are not really on my wishlist. However, after a ridiculously long time wasted scrolling through the list I ordered a tumeric clay face mask, some under eye patches and a collagen wrap mask, all from brands that I have never heard of . The turmeric face mask was a success, my face felt clean, soft and fresh after using it. The eye patches I did not like at all, they felt slimy and disintegrated on my face. I was wary of leaving the collagen mask on my face all night so tried it one my hands instead to no visible effect. Today I have ordered some luggage tags for my son and some sunglass pouches. As someone who does not like a lot of clutter, this could be a slippery slope.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Saddle Bags – Splurge, Spend or Save?

On By samanthaIn SHOPPINGLeave a comment

Last year I sold what few designer items I owned. I wasn’t using them and they were just taking up space in my wardrobe. My Mulberry bags I sold on a Facebook group, always a bit risky but I insisted on using PayPal Goods & Services and I sold some small leather goods on eBay. I was particularly fortunate in selling a Chanel wallet because I was sure nobody would want a huge purse anymore but I kept an eye on the Chanel buying and selling Facebook page and, by a stroke of luck, somebody was on the lookout for the exact same one. I manged to recoup almost all of my money.

So, I actually do now need a new bag. I have been using a Mulberry Anthony lookalike from Marks and Spencer but it is looking a little tatty now and I don’t like the style enough to splash out on the designer version, it’s a little masculine for me. After some online perusing I decided I’d like a saddle bag style and the Mulberry Pimlico Satchel in Black Cherry caught my eye. I managed to order it over the phone from their outlet store in Bicester for £416. When the bag arrived it was absolutely beautiful but the calf leather looked like it would scratch very easily and that’s no good for me so I reluctantly returned it. I started searching online for different options and there are many! If you happen to have won the lottery you could treat yourself to Dior’s iconic and very beautiful Saddle bag which costs £3,340. Chloe sell a style called Marcie which is very pretty at a hefty £1,490.

Then I found myself becoming engrossed in the Netflix romantic comedy Nobody Wants This with Kristen Bell and Adam Brody. Bell plays Joanne, a blonde atheist who falls in love with a Rabbi. Joanne’s wardrobe is just gorgeous, although sadly too young for me, and I spotted this Claude bag from French fashion company Sezane. Still a fairly hefty price tag of £345 but the quality looks good and it comes in different types of leather. I popped into the Sezane store in Marylebone where there were lots of bags on display but I didn’t like any of them enough to make a purchase.

During a recent stroll around Covent Garden I popped into a branch of The Cambridge Satchel Company to escape the cold. They have a small collection devoted to the Wicked movie but they also have this attractive, if slightly bulky, style called The Kate for £250. They stock another quite minimalist style, simply called The Saddle Bag for £130. Barbour sell something similar, a style called Laire, in two different sizes starting at £89.95.

Next stock this non-leather bugundy saddle bag for just £34. I think it looks almost as nice at the far more expensive options although not the Dior obviously. It also comes in black. Similarly priced at £39.50 is this glossy black bag from Marks and Spencer.

I visited Hoopers department Store in lovely Tunbridge Wells where a display of bags (featured in my header photo) made by Campamaggi caught my eye. Soft, burnished leather and decorated with rivets and lacing, they retail at around £350. Also on display were the classic Longchamp Epure bags at £295. So, far too much choice for me to be able to make a decision as usual. I headed home and later on saw a Facebook advertisement for the DeMellier sale. There was a very pretty style called the Mini Venice featured at £298. In a rare moment of decisiveness I ordered one in the colour Berry, the last one in stock according to the website. I am delighted with my purchase which came beautifully boxed. The strap is a great length, the bag holds my purse, phone, keys, glasses and a small make up bag. It also has a top handle for more formal occasions. My search is over!

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

My DeMellier Mini Venice bag featured in the middle photo flanked by Longchamp Le Foulonne and Epure bags.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Budget Beauty Buys – Hits & Misses

On By samanthaIn HEALTHLeave a comment

I am at that age where I need to start taking action to prevent crepey skin on my body, in fact I probably should have begun some years ago but I have never liked using body lotion. I have noticed the sagging, wrinkled effect beginning on so many people, especially their arms and chest and it isn’t attractive but then, what part of aging is? I remember my beautiful Godmother, Josephine, complaining about her skin beginning to look wrinkled when she was eighty five but sadly I don’t have her amazing genes.

I moisturise my face and neck twice a day without fail and have done since my late teens. Sometimes I splash out and treat myself to something fancy from Chanel or Clarins but, more often than not, I will pick up a jar of something in the supermarket, Nivea Q10 or Olay. I noticed that Boots No 7 had an offer on so I ordered their Lift and Luminate gift set for £62.95. The set comprises of face oil, day and night creams and face and eye serums. I have enjoyed all the products apart from the face serum which leaves a blue, glittery sheen on my face. I will definitely repurchase the eye serum. The face oil smells gorgeous and just two tiny drops leaves my face looking hydrated and a little bit glowy. Have any of these potions made a visible difference to any signs of aging – no, but they have kept my face feeling soft, they smell nice and have represented good value for money.

I have been using the same face wash for years, Nivea Gentle Cleansing Cream Wash but it seemed to be out of stock everywhere recently so, on a visit to Tesco I picked up some L’Oreal Hyaluron Expert Wash but within two days of using it I had red, sore patches under my nose and between my brows. I don’t have particularly sensitive skin but this seems to be too strong. Maybe it would be a winner for someone with oily skin.

For my body I bought Garnier Nourishing Ceramide Body Butter which was on offer for about £5, it has a vanilla fragrance. I liked this product so much that I also bought Garnier Vitamin C Nutri Glow Body Cream in a mango scent which literally smells good enough to eat. I can’t recommend these well priced products enough, they are very effective at moisturising even the driest patches

My nails are, to be quite honest, rather a disgrace. Apart from before my wedding, I have never had a professional manicure in my life. Firstly all the young people working in these places (and there are so many nail bars in my town) seem to be from Vietnam and I worry that they are being trafficked. Also, professional nail upkeep is so expensive and time consuming. I might give them a quick file when one of them breaks but that’s about the extent of my maintenance. I do always polish my toenails in the summer though in an attempt to spruce up my hideous feet. I bought myself some Essie gel polish in a lilac shade called Strut with it. The polish and gel top coat are both £11. You can usually expect your gel manicure to last about ten days. I have tried the cheaper D-i-Y gel polishes but Essie does seem to be the best. I also recommend Mavala nail polishes, they do a beautiful icy pink shade called Glacier, perfect for toenails. I used to wear their deep burgundy shade called Las Vegas in my twenties and they still sell it thirty years later. At £6.40 it is a great alternative to Chanel’s iconic Rouge Noir.

So some great, reasonably priced beauty buys. I think just slowing down and taking the time to induge in a little self care is very important and it doesn’t really matter if the products you are using cost £50 or £5. In fact, I’m sure some of the cheaper options are just as effective.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

A Day Out in Kent – Lullingstone Castle and The World Garden

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

A lovely friend of mine has just visited from Australia. She had an impossibly busy schedule but we agreed to meet on Saturday. She was staying at the Premier Inn in my town so I picked her up and we decided to visit Lullingstone Castle and its “World Garden” .

If you decide to visit Lullingstone don’t do the logical thing and follow the signs for the castle, they will simply take you to a pair of locked gates. You have to head for Lullingstone Roman Villa and then you drive behind the visitor centre and the castle will be revealed in all its beauty. It really is like a scene from Brideshead Revisited. There was even a vintage Rolls Royce parked outside. To visit the house and garden costs a very reasonable £12.50 for adults. There are concessions for OAPs and children.

Both Henry VIII and Queen Anne are known to have been regular visitors to the castle which now comprises of a manor house, gate house, church and a stunning lake. Inside the house you can see one of Queen Anne’s hair pieces along with other historical objects. There are lots of models of the castle on display and a friendly volunteer to answer any questions. The current owner, whose family have owned Lullingstone since 1497, warmly greeted us at the door and chatted to my friend about her own travels. I did wonder if owning such a huge property is as much of a burden as it is a blessing. The upkeep must be enormous.

On the grounds, as you enter through the gatehouse there is St Botolph’s church, of Norman origin and made of flint, which boasts some of the oldest stained glass windows in the world, some from the fourteenth century. Although it is small there is plenty to see inside.

If you have heard of the castle before it may because of the BBC series Save Lullingstone Castle, and Return to Lullingstone Castle or because the son of the owners, Tom Hart Dyke was kidnapped in the Panamanian jungle during an expedition in the year 2000. He and his companions were held for nine months. Thankfully they were eventually released and I remember seeing him on a talk show after his ordeal was over. He has gone on to have a successful career in botany and, whilst in captivity, came up with the idea for the World Garden at Lullingstone. As the name suggests, the garden takes visitors on a botanical tour of the world and is really very quirky and charming. There are lots of unusual plants to see, some sculptures and a touch of kitsch here and there, like the pair of plastic penguins either side of an entry way.

The castle has a cafe where “light refreshments” are served and guests are also permitted to bring their own picnic. There is a gift shop and a nursery so that you can purchase some plants of your own. I thought Lullingstone was really lovely and I will definitely be back again, next time I will visit the Roman Villa as well.

After the castle we decided to go to for a pub lunch. We drove to a nearby village and had possibly the worst meal out I’ve ever experienced. The manager was so rude and unhelpful when my friend asked a question about the menu. I ordered a burger which was served with some sort of sloppy meat on the side. There was literally no service apart from the lad who brought our plates over but a 12.5% service charge was added to the bill. We went to the bar for drinks and ordered from a QR code, something I am wary about after a friend’s husband fell victim to a scam where a fake code was stuck onto a menu. Anyway I won’t name the pub which may be in the most picturesque location but I certainly won’t be returning.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

The Dementia Diaries – Chapter Seventeen, The Care Agency

On By samanthaIn THE DEMENTIA DIARIESLeave a comment

Dad and I looked at the list of care agencies given to us by the visitor from Social Services. Most of them were located more than fifteen miles away. There is a local agency but I did not want to use them because I have seen one of their carers in the local park screaming abuse at somebody. Dad rang Age UK and they recommended some other agencies and we booked an initial meeting with one of these.

Two women arrived from the agency, one manager and a young woman who seemed to be learning the ropes. They arrived at 12pm and Mum would always be up by then but, on this particular day she had gone back to bed after breakfast saying that she felt unwell. Never in my life before have I known Mum to be in bed at midday. Anyway the older manager was very much into cross selling her company’s services. I explained that Dad is not going to pay almost forty pounds an hour for cleaning and she was visibly disappointed. I explained that we were considering booking a couple of initial sessions where the carer would come in and bathe Mum and wash her hair. The manager started pushing for every day. I was glad I had attended because I can see how elderly people can be pressured into agreeing to more of the care agency’s time than they can really afford.

I explained that Mum would usually be up at this time but she was feeling unwell. The manager asked to see her and, again I reiterated that Mum was asleep. “Just let me see her” she said. I took the manager and her colleague upstairs and into Mum and Dad’s bedroom. Mum was lying on her back, fast asleep looking white as a sheet The manager called Mum’s name in a booming voice, scaring her. Mum became very distressed. If I was woken by two strangers in my bedroom I would be terrified, anyone would. I went over and reassured Mum who was overjoyed to see me for once. Then the manager said it is neglectful to leave Mum in bed all day. For the third time I explained that Mum is NEVER in bed all day , I began to feel really annoyed and judged. The manager then said that their carer would wash Mum but wouldn’t be prepared to manoeuvre her into the bath. I said would write to the contact at Social Service and see if we could have a bath chair. This was supposed to have been supplied before. Everything is such hard work.

Despite my misgivings, Dad seemed keen on booking them in so we arranged for two visits the following week. The manager said she had a particularly kind, patient carer in mind. I was working on the day she visited but rang Dad once I had finished, he sound exhausted and exasperated, predictably Mum had refused to be washed. The carer made Mum a cup of tea and left, Dad said she seemed very nice and patient. Later that evening Dad rang me and said mum was crying. I popped round and Mum said her back hurt, I gave her some pain killers and tried to straighten up the cushions on her chair but she wouldn’t let me. She told me to go home and leave her alone. Dad asked me to help with a problem on his computer, we were out of the room five minutes and Mum must have shouted out, demanding dinner, at least fifteen times.

I woke at 4am this morning worrying. Mum is clearly not cleaning herself and she will not allow anyone else to help. What on Earth are we going to do? She could have a bottom covered in sores but we wouldn’t know. What if we need to call an ambulance or doctor out, they will think we have not been looking after her. The same carer is coming again in a couple of days and we will try again but I am not optimistic. I think we are going to have to consider a care home if this refusal continues.

Samantha

Cover Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash

The Dementia Diaries – Chapter Sixteen Care Assessment

On By samanthaIn THE DEMENTIA DIARIESLeave a comment

Since my last Dementia Diaries post in March things have worsened considerably. My aunt had her 90th birthday party in a village hall some twenty miles away, and for the first time, I realised that Mum was too far into her Alzheimers to attend. My parents have never driven and my husband and I always take them along to any family occasion, they have never once been left out of anything. It was my aunt who suggested that it wouldn’t be a good idea to bring mum “she’ll want to go home as soon as you arrive” she said. That was very true but it was also the fact of Mum’s urinary incontinence. If the M25 is at a standstill we would be in the car for an hour both ways and the village hall toilets wouldn’t be a vey private place for dealing with any accidents. My aunt had a wonderful time, she was chatting to her one hundred and eighty guests and got up to dance. Mum, on the other hand, can barely get out of her armchair. It really does seem like a lottery as to what sort of old age, if any, you get to experience. My parents have really lived a very healthy life but, for Mum, it doesn’t seem to have paid off. I suppose living to eighty nine is a privilege in itself.

Mum has started to become more and more resentful of my visits and her constantly telling me to “go home” has now changed into “bugger off”, something she would never have said pre-Alzheimers. Dad and I have been trying to persuade her to let me help her bath or shower but she refuses. The last time we gingerly raised the topic it resulted in an hour of nonsensical arguing and Mum pretending to cry. It is as if we are somehow abusing her rather than trying to help. It makes me feel terrible to see her so confused and distressed. Dad can’t help her, if Mum slips she will take him down with her, they are both now so frail. Dad wants to arrange for their mobile hairdresser to visit along with the podiatrist and I said we can’t expect these people to tend to Mum when she is not clean. We are both worried about her developing sores or an infection. It is so difficult because what do you do when someone point blank refuses to bath or shower?

I filled in a request for a Care Assessment on the Kent Council website and it took about six weeks for the visit to happen. A lady called Sarah arrived at my parents house. It wasn’t quite what I had expected. Dad and I explained the issues, although it is very obvious from the moment you walk in the front door. Sarah said that my parents are not entitled to any free care (my dad does now receive enhanced attendance allowance which a local charity helped him apply for) but that the council can recommend some care agencies. Sarah and I went upstairs and she said that some of the carers will do cleaning as well, she commented on the strong smell of urine in the bedroom. Dad opens the windows and Mum closes them. I vacuum my parents house, clean the kitchen floor and put the laundry mountain away twice every week but I hadn’t cleaned their bathroom as I haven’t been allowed. To be honest I was a little embarrassed when I saw how grubby it was. Two days later I was back over there with a bottle of Cif and some bleach. Asking the carer to clean seems quite an expensive way of doing things as the carers charge about £15 more per hour than a regular cleaner. Also, Dad has turned into a bit of a hoarder and I am not sure how much cleaning someone could actually do around the boxes of stuff everywhere.

Throughout the entire conversation Mum kept calling out “what’s happening?” and “what are you talking about?” so we kept explaining to make sure she felt we were speaking to her rather than about her. Sarah asked Mum if she would consent to someone helping her shower and Mum said yes. This is because she had no idea what Sarah was saying. Sarah then said that it would all be alright as Mum has agreed. In reality I know that, when the carer arrives, mum will go into full refusal mode. Mum then started telling Sarah to “bugger off” and “sod off”. Sarah just laughed, she is obviously used to this sort of behaviour. Before leaving Sarah gave us a directory of carers but many of them are out of our area. We have booked a visit in tomorrow simply to discuss Mum’s needs. Dad got the name of the care agency from Age Concern.

When I was upstairs with Sarah she said “your mum is at the end now”. I must have looked quite shocked at her bluntness because she then said “of her Alzheimers”. The clarification, didn’t really make any difference, it all amounts to the same thing. Poor mum, such an energetic, capable and kind person reduced to this. You would not wish Alzheimers disease on your worst enemy.

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

Cover Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash

A Day Out in London – Afternoon Tea at The Langham

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

My friend kindly invited me and another mutual, friend out to afternoon tea at The Langham which is a hotel located in Portland Place, a two minute walk from Oxford Circus station. I have only had afternoon tea at a swanky hotel once before, The Savoy about eight years ago, and what I remember was that my sister-in-law politely requested that some of the cakes be put into a box so that she could take them home for her family as she didn’t want to eat any then and there and the waiter refused. So she paid about £125 for a cup of Darjeeling. Afternoon tea at The Langham is slightly less expensive but the bill still came to a hefty £101 per person. Of course you are paying for the location and experience as much as for the tea and sandwiches.

The Langham is a very impressive hotel which opened in 1865. Tea is served in their Palm Court area. It is a stunningly elegant dining room. Dress code is smart casual but there were plenty of people wearing trainers, I suppose people tag on a 3pm tea experience to a morning of site seeing and no one wants to be doing that in formal shoes. I didn’t spot any jeans though. As part of my decluttering project I have decided to try and wear clothes I already own rather than buy anything new and wore some ivory tailored trousers from Mango, a black boucle jacket from H&M and a silk top that I have had forever but only worn once before, from Boden. On my feet I wore some well worn-in ballet flats because I’ve had many a special occasion ruined by .uncomfortable shoes. I was tempted to slip my trainers into a tote bag for the journey home.

My outing didn’t get off to the smoothest start as I could not park anywhere near my local train station. Most of the spots are now restricted to two hours which is ridiculous because who goes in to London and comes back again in that time? After driving around the multi-story car park twice and not finding a single space I rang my friend and manage to catch her before she set out on her own fruitless search for parking. I drove to her house and we rang for a taxi and manage to catch our train.

Once arriving at Oxford Circus via the Bakerloo Line we simply crossed the road and walked a few yards and we were there. I wish I had some pictures but when I sat down in the dining room I realised I couldn’t find my phone. After a second’s panic thinking I’d been robbed or had dropped it in central London I decided that I had probably just left it in my car and, sure enough, that’s exactly what had happened. I managed not to sit there the entire time worrying about it but when we caught the slowest train ever home I did begin to feel a bit jittery.

The Palm Court is stunning. If I go to anything like this again I will be sure not to sit facing the wall because it was impossible to people watch, my favourite thing, from where I was sitting. The walls are decorated with gold coloured ornaments and the chandeliers are beautiful. A pianist played songs from Les Miserable, Wicked and some Billy Joel. It really is the picture of elegance.

The staff at The Langham were far less snooty than at The Savoy. They gave us a warm welcome and explained the menu. I chose Phoenix Honey Orchid tea which was, quite frankly, disgusting. I stuck to water after that. We were brought a platter of finger sandwiches, egg, cream cheese, prawn and Coronation chicken, they were exceptionally delicious. We ate all of them and the lovely, friendly waitress bright some more. Next were the most beautiful small pastries, three for each of us in lemon, coffee and strawberry flavours. The three of us were all sitting there feeling fit to burst when the waitress brought over a little crème brulee creation with a candle in it for my friend. Just as we thought the bill would be arriving we were served warm miniature scones with jam and clotted cream and a gorgeous fruit cake which we had boxed up for my friend’s family. The waitress bought the boxed cake over in a branded gift bag and said she’d popped some extra scones in there too, how lovely. The food was amazing and there was far more of it than I had expected. We waddled back to the Tube. If you are thinking of doing a posh afternoon tea in London then The Langham is the place to go.

For my friend’s birthday gift we bought her a gift set from The White Company in Sea Salt scent. She took that home along with the scones and fruit cake and I think she really had a lovely afternoon, I know I did.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

A Day Out in London – Siena: The Rise of Painting, 1300 ‒1350 at The National Gallery & Marylebone Village

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

The Siena exhibition at The National Gallery is breath-taking. If you would like to view some of Europe’s earliest artwork, beautifully displayed, then this is the exhibition for you. It features the work of fourteenth century Italian artists, Duccio, Simone Martini and the brothers Pietro and Ambrogio Lorenzetti . When they completed their masterpieces seven hundred years ago did these artists ever imagine that people would still be admiring them so far into the future? The work is all of a religious theme, there are many images of the Virgin Mary with Jesus as a baby and of course countless crucifixion scenes.

There are over one hundred exhibits including fragments of intricately woven silk, rugs, plaster panels, ivory statuettes, altarpieces. One scene painted by Ducci shows Mary recovering from labour. In many of the artworks she looks sorrowful, already aware of the fate of her baby son. The accompanying narrative displayed next to each exhibit was very informative, I did not know that Mary’s parents were called Anne and Joachim

Many works by Pietro Lorenzetti and his brother Ambrogio are featured. There is diptch that displays Christ’s brith on one side and his crucifixion on the other. There is an enormous crucifix with a sinister skull lying at the bottom. So many exquisite things to see. I am just glad I was not responsible for transporting so may fragile objects.

After the gallery we caught a bus to Marylebone Village and had a light lunch in the French restaurant Aubaine. The bus driver did not speak a word of English and kept playing the wrong announcements so it was rather comical. Marylebone Village consists of coffee shops, restaurants and clothing boutiques such as Sandro, Sezane, Me & Em, and Rizo. Not the very high end designers but you still need a few hundred pounds to buy a dress in most of the stores. We spent some time looking at pretty things in Sezane but neither my friend or I bought anything. Some of the shops had more staff than customers and I wonder how they all keep going. There is a lovely relaxed atmosphere in the village and I will definitely go back and explore a little bit more soon

Thank you for reading

Samantha

A Day Out in London – The Frameless Exhibition and Selfridges

On By samanthaIn GOING OUT1 Comment

I enjoy a day out in London every couple of months and keep an eye out for interesting new things to see and do. A friend recommended Frameless, an immersive art experience near Marylebone. Perfectly located for a look around Selfridges afterwards. I chose flexible tickets which meant we could arrive at any time of our choosing on a particular day. They cost £37. This was only slightly more expensive than the set time tickets and meant that train delays wouldn’t cause any unnecessary stress. We caught a train just after 9.30am in order to enjoy a whole day in London. When we arrived at Marble Arch station there were whiteboards displaying warnings to commuters not to take their phone out outside the station and announcements blaring through the tannoy saying there had been numerous phone robberies outside the tube that week. What a pity that every city now seems to be full of thieves.

Because we were now paranoid about looking at Google maps on our phones we bumbled around for ten minutes trying to find the location but, in fact, it is a one minute walk from the tube. The exhibition itself is fabulous! Frameless is made up of four huge galleries where forty two works of art are animated and brought to life. There is another gallery near the gift shop exhibiting the work of somebody the staff referred to as an intern but really they are an artist in residence. The friendly lady in the gift shop told me their best selling item are realistic soft toy pigeons, nothing to do with the artwork which made me laugh.

Each gallery is very different. There are seating areas within each one and a lovely café should you wish to break your visit up. Information boards tell visitors what they can expect to find in each room and you can see the order in which the art is screened. The scale of the art works is incredibly impressive and they are projected onto the walls, floor and ceiling. In the first gallery this creates a sensation of moving even when you know you are standing still and made me feel a bit dizzy for a moment. The second gallery we visited “Colour in Motion” displayed works by Monet and Vincent Van Gough and the paintings are formed by swirling brush strokes that gradually come together to make the finished image. There were tiny children in the gallery who were having a whale of a time chasing the brush strokes and even a baby in a sling cooing in wonder. In the “Beyond Reality” gallery The Cyclops by Odilon Redon comes to life and peeks out behind a mountain The Scream by Edvard Munch turns into a nightmarish black hole of a mouth. At this exhibition you can see singers under a lamppost in London, Volcanoes in Pompeii, ships being tossed about on crashing waves, Venetian scenes and all sorts of strange creatures stomping around. The final gallery “The Art of Abstraction” shows work by artists such as Kandinsky and Klint and is perhaps slightly less suitable for young children as it is very dark the art here is displayed in a maze like display of mesh screens. Each gallery has wonderful atmospheric music playing from Spanish guitar to jazz. It really is a true immersive experience. I would recommend Frameless to anybody who is looking for something a little bit different to do.

After lunch we ventured into Selfridges and had a very mediocre lunch in their ground floor café. I used to work near Bond Street and would often enjoy a mooch around this beautiful department store during my lunch break. I would buy pretty stationary or a scarf. It is very different now, just made up of luxury concessions. If you want to purchase Chanel, Hermes, Louis Vuitton etc. you will be in the right place. If you just want a little treat then there is the beauty hall where you can pick up a fancy lip gloss or bottle of fragrance. We looked around one of the Chanel concessions and oohed a little bit at all the beautiful, wildly expensive things. Pale blue seemed to be the colour of the season and everything was trimmed with crystals or pearls. I tried a Bayswater Satchel on in the Mulberry concession but they didn’t have it in the colour I liked and I had just spent the equivalent amount of money on a new computer for work so, sadly, it wasn’t really day for purchasing expensive new leather goods.

On Oxford Street there were lots of rather aggressive elderly women beggars from overseas, something I hadn’t encountered before anywhere but Italy. I wonder where they all go at the end of the day. The sight of so many homeless people lining the pavements is very sad and I suppose fewer passer bys give them money now as we are largely a cashless society.

We popped into a couple of shops on Oxford Street, Zara and Uniqlo, but this was a Saturday and the crowds were ridiculous. I know some people find beautiful things in Zara but I don’t find the quality to be very good. Uniqlo is brilliant for basics like T shirts and my son likes their crew neck jumpers. I was tempted by one of their popular sling bags but, after seeing the Chanel delights, they didn’t hold much quite so much appeal. After half an hour or so we headed back to the Tube and managed to travel home without being robbed.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

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The Dementia Diaries – Chapter Fifteen No Progress

On By samanthaIn THE DEMENTIA DIARIESLeave a comment

It is March and Mum’s cognitive health has deteriorated noticeably since Christmas. Dad has lost a lot of weight and is limping, he has always had problematic feet, probably because he wore ill-fitting shoes as a child. The podiatrist comes and visits him at home, it is an expensive service, almost one hundred pounds a time. The NHS do not appear to offer home visits for podiatry. Dad doesn’t have any time to himself at all. I keep offering to come and sit with Mum so that he can perhaps go to an art class or simply walk up to the village and have a quiet coffee but he won’t go anywhere without Mum. He still buys her flowers every single week.

Apart from a hospital appointment which I took them to, I don’t think my parents have left the house in three months. Mum was always someone who had to be out doing something every day. Now she just sits in her arm chair calling Dad’s name if he is out of her sight for more than a few seconds. Apparently it is common for dementia sufferers to experience anxiety if their main carer is out of sight. The washing machine is permanently on, Mum now generates more washing than my family of five. She isn’t bathing or washing her hair and it is obvious that she needs assistance with her personal hygiene. I ask on our local Facebook group for recommendations of carers and a couple of people privately message me, one someone who was another mother at my son’s school. She tells me she can hardly believe Mum’s dementia situation is dragging on so long. Her own father died of Alzheimer’s disease some years ago and he had a wonderful carer, she shares the details. I tell Dad I think it is time we insist on having a carer visit at least a couple of times a week. I can see he is reluctant. I reassure him that I have a name of a woman who comes highly recommended. Dad decides to ignore this and simply does a Google search and books a visit from a company I have never heard of. Dad says they must be alright, they have a website! I am slightly irritated by this.

My husband tells me that Tower Hamlets Council coordinate all his mother’s care and that he doesn’t understand why I am not going down that route. They have providers they use and they invoice my mother-in-law monthly. He said that, once my parents are on Social Services radar, they will be obligated to help and that he has been stunned by the amount of assistance and attention that his own mother receives. I decide to apply for a care assessment to see what the council say about providing or arranging some care for my parents. Dad and I fill in the form online and wait to hear. We cancel the visit from the mystery care company.

The assessment is supposedly arranged for 11am on a Monday morning. I feel it is crucial that I attend and book the time off work. Whoever is supposed to be coming doesn’t turn up. It would be most unlike Dad to make a mistake about an appointment but I am not convinced that whoever he was expecting was actually coming about the assessment. After being on hold for half an hour, Dad gets through to the correct department and they tell him that there is nothing in their diary and we won’t be hearing anything about the assessment for some weeks. The person we speaks to thinks it may have been one of the charities that the council liaises with that were due to visit but they aren’t sure. Dad only has the first name of the expected visitor and no direct contact details for them but he is certain they are from one of the council older-people departments. While all of this is going on Mum is becoming more and more agitated. She suddenly blurts out “I don’t want to go into an old people’s home”. I am stunned. Dad and I have never discussed this, even privately but Mum has probably heard the phrase “Social Services” and, even in her confused state, realised that something is afoot. We had explained to her earlier about the purpose of the visit and, as was to be expected, she had denied the need for any help. Dad and I try to reassure Mum that was aren’t making arrangements to put her in a care home but she tells me she doesn’t care about me and that she wants me to go home. I have to get back to work anyway so leave feeling sad, guilty and annoyed at a wasted morning.

So, we are no further on. My husband says that his mum’s health has improved no end since she has had her carers. They come in four times a day, every day. Meanwhile, Dad and I struggle on with no help which is just how my parents seem to want things.

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

Cover Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash