Author: samantha

A Day Out in London – Flowers – Flora in Contemporary Art at The Saatchi Gallery

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

This was my first visit to The Saatchi Gallery. I travelled there by train then Tube, getting off at Sloane Square, it is about a two minute walk from the station. The Flowers – Flora in Contemporary Art exhibition is jam-packed and full of surprises, over five hundred pieces are included. The first exhibits include Primavera by Sandro Botticelli and Irises by Van Gough but the poor lighting did rather fail to do them justice but this improves after the first room . The exhibition features photography, sculpture, book and record artwork, cinema, painting etc. There are wallpaper and textile samples by Sanderson and William Morris and etchings by Elizabeth Blackadder. There is also a large print of Wordsworth’s I wandered Lonely as a Cloud.

My cover photo features the real show-stopper, La Fleur Morte, by Rebecca Louise Law. Over one hundred thousand dried flowers and seeds strung together on copper wire to form a stunningly beautiful cascading installation. To me it looked like something out of a book of fairy tales. It was worth visiting this exhibition for this enormous piece alone. I cannot imagine the logistics of transporting and displaying such a delicate work of art and the dedication required to complete such a time consuming masterpiece.

In a room featuring photographs and sculptures, which felt a little bare, there was a quirky sculpture by Joanne Grogan, Best Chair. This was was one of my favourite pieces, made of wood and ceramic. In the same room there was displayed a large, mesmerising, mechanical flower sculpture, The Machinery of Enchantment (2025) by William Darrell made with a 3D printer.

Pieces by fashion icons Mary Quant and Vivienne Westwood are on display as is exquisite flower-themed jewellery by Buccellati. An elegant wedding dress by Daniel Roseberry for Schiaparelli was the star of the fashion section. There are black and white prints of people covered in botanical tattoos drawn freehand by Daniel The Gardener, There are a few Andy Warhol pieces and three silver flower display sculptures on pedestals by Ann Carrington which, upon closer inspection, are ingeniously made of cutlery.

In the room featuring music, film and literature there were glass displays of books with flowers featured on the covers and record covers galore. The Cure, Joyce Carol Oates, Prince, the list of authors and musicians using floral imagery to represent their work is endless. A scene from the film Midsomer by director Aster plays. I haven’t seen the film but a beautiful young girl covered in flowers is featured and she looks terrified, like some sort of sacrificial offering.

The exhibition is extensive and entertaining. It did feel a little disjointed at times but I really enjoyed it. If your pockets are deep enough of course some of the pieces are available for purchase. Otherwise the gift shop sells some lovely items.

If you visit this exhibition wearing floral clothing until 20th august you will be admitted for half price although you can’t then book online

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Best CHair by Joanne Grogan, Fashion by Vivienne Westwood, The Machinery of Enchantment (2025) by William Darrell

Arrangement_ 593 by Tony Matelli, Botanical tattoos by Daniel The Gardener and a detail from La Fleur Morte, by Rebecca Louise Law

Things That Get On My Nerves – Possibly One in a Series !!😠

On By samanthaIn FAMILYLeave a comment

Maybe it is just me but, as I have got older I feel I am becoming a little less easy-going. This week a lot of people and situations have got on my nerves so I shall have a vent here.

Firstly, I sold two items on my local Facebook Marketplace page. A huge soft toy and a new Pandora Charm. Within minutes of my listings being approved I received messages from two women saying they’d like the items. I arranged times with them to collect and waited in. And waited, and waited and waited. Neither of them turned up or replied to my messages. This has happened to me so many times. Why waste other people time like this? Don’t they feel in the least bit guilty? A couple of years ago I was giving away a hamster cage and the same woman didn’t turn up three times. My husband was cross with me for letting her mess me around and still have the item. Another time I was giving away an enormous framed picture. After saying she’d like it a woman said she couldn’t collect and could I drop it off? Like an idiot I set off in search of her house, which literally didn’t exist. She told me she lived at number 110 but there was no such number in the street. I pulled over from outside 109, messaged her and she replied with ten laughing emojis , she had given me the wrong street name. Hilarious! So then she told me it was a block of flats on a corner, which corner was a mystery, there were two corners and two blocks of flats. Exasperated, I parked and asked her to walk to my car. She told me she couldn’t as she had two sleeping children (I later discovered after snooping on her profile they were about fifteen years old) so I lugged this heavy picture to her flat. She opened the door in her pyjamas, it was four o’clock in the afternoon. What a mug I am. I got home and blocked her .

Today I took a pile of freshly washed and ironed clothes to a charity shop on my local high street. I have a rule that, if I am going into town I whizz around my house having a quick declutter before leaving home. I got to the counter and the man behind the till was reading a magazine. I asked where to leave my donation and he just said “nope”. He didn’t even glance up. I asked what he meant and he grunted “we’re full”. Charming. Fortunately the next shop was grateful for my freshly laundered items.

Then there’s the person who, in an almost empty car park, parked so close to me that I had to scramble over the passenger seat to get into my vehicle, what’s that about? Walking along our street my daughter stepped into the road to make room for an elderly woman to pass. Instead of thanking her the elderly woman gave my daughter a filthy look. Years ago my oldest son would accompany me to drop my daughter off at nursery and every morning he would open a door for the same woman and her pushchair. She never once smiled at him or said thank you. After this happened a dozen times I told him to let her struggle with the door herself. Maybe not the best example but she deserved it.

All these little annoyances add up don’t they? I need to remember that using Facebook Marketplace is never a good idea and that some people have no manners. Deep breaths!

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Cover photo by Nik on Unsplash

Six, The Musical and Dinner in Covent Garden

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

I had been hearing such good things from friends about Six The Musical so I decided to go and see it for myself. The show is on at the Vaudeville Theatre in the Strand. I paid approximately £130 for two tickets for a Saturday evening performance. We were seated in the upper circle, the seats couldn’t really have been better.

We caught the train from our local station to Charing Cross and then had a mooch around Covent Garden. Most of the shops were closed but there was still an buzzing atmosphere with , street performers such as contortionists, magicians and musicians. We went to Buns and Buns and had a steak dinner with a large glass of wine which was delicious.

The first, and only negative, thing I will say about Six is that it is unnecessarily loud, so loud in fact I did actually worry about damaging my hearing when it started. The show was written in 2017 by Cambridge University students Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss and was first performed by the university’s musical theatre group at the Edinborough Fringe Festival. Six is the tale of Henry the Eighth’s six wives, all told through song and dance. It has a similar fast-paced, high-energy vibe to Hamilton. The performers playing the wives enter the stage wearing various sexy interpretations of Tudor costume. All the musicians are women too, it is definitely a Girl Power show.

Each “wife” sings a number summarising how she met Henry and what fate befell her. Some of the tales are extremely sad. Tickets to Six would be a great gift idea for anyone studying history and I learned some facts that I hadn’t known before. Ann of Cleves was chosen by Henry after he saw a portrait of her by the German artist Hans Holbein. When Henry saw Ann in the flesh he declared she was ugly and their marriage was eventually annulled. She was luckier than Ann Boleyn and Catherine Howard though who famously lost their heads. Ann of Cleve’s musical number is very night-clubbish and there is a strong element of fun and humour throughout the whole musical. There is strobe lighting at a number of points in the show. My favourite performance was from Thao Therese Nguyen, the actress playing Anne Boleyn who somehow managed to stand out on a stage crowded with female talent.

Unusually, the show lasts for about an hour an a quarter, there is no interval. To be honest, I wish more productions were like this. I imagine the theatre loses a lot of revenue though as theatre-goers aren’t buying drinks in their bar or purchasing merchandise. We had sped through some really interesting herstory, pardon the pun, and were back home by 9.30am. A pretty perfect evening.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

A Trip to Copenhagen – Part Two

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

We decided to visit Rosenborg Castle on the second day of our trip to Copenhagen. We booked tickets the same morning via the official website. The castle staff are very strict and won’t let you enter even a minute early. The castle and its surroundings are so beautiful. A little like at Buckingham Palace, soldiers march up and down outside and woe betide anyone who gets in their way. One member of the castle staff screamed to a toddler to get out of their way, it was a little harsh but the little boy’s dad didn’t seem too perturbed. Inside there is so much to see including portraits of various members of Danish royalty, many of whom were a bit… strange looking. There’s a whole room dedicated to glass wear but it would have been helpful to have an audio guide so we could know exactly what we were looking at. The Renaissance castle is home to the Danish crown jewels which we didn’t see because my daughter needed the loo, which is outside, and we could not get back in. It was a hot day and, to be honest we had had enough of the stuffiness. The castle is located in perhaps the most beautiful spot in Copenhagen, next to the Kings Gardens where you can go for a stroll afterwards. The cover image of this post is the view from the castle windows.

A sign for the Kings Gardens, A soldier outside Rosenborg Castle, The Glass Cabinet, Rosenborg Castle

The following morning my dad called to say that Mum had been taken ill and that the GP had called an ambulance. I spent several hours worrying but my brother and his wife live in the same town as the hospital and they were able to go and help. Fortunately Mum wasn’t admitted and is now recovering from an infection. As you can imagine, it did rather blight the day but, after I knew that Mum was going to be alright and I didn’t need to fly home, we went to Tivoli Gardens. This is the theme park that inspired Disney World and the second oldest theme park in the world, opening in 1843. It is a must if you are visiting the city with young people. There are more than thirty rides which I am sure my daughter would have loved had she been with friends but we paid around £20 each for entrance to the park, not including the rides. We then paid an additional £12 to go into the aquarium . There are numerous food stands, cafes and bars dotted around and plenty of places to sit and relax. The atmosphere is just lovely and the gardens are very pretty.

Photos from Tivoli Gardens, the aquarium, me trying not to worry about my mum, the gardens

On our final full day we visited the Botanical Gardens and the Natural History Museum . There was an icy wind and it was drizzling so we didn’t stay in the gardens for long. They are free to enter but you do need to pay to go into the Palm House. There is a very charming old building in the gardens which houses the Pioneer Centre for Artificial Intelligence research, an odd stetting for something so futuristic. The centre is not open to the public. The museum was well worth a visit. There is currently a wildlife photography exhibition showing which we really enjoyed. There is a whole room of fossils, stuffed animals, tusks and shells that visitors can touch and there was a children’s workshop taking place. It did make me sad to see the stuffed tiger, polar bear and other creatures but they have all been long-deceased. The museum staff were all very friendly and enthusiastic. Afterwards we went to the farmer’s market opposite our hotel for the most delicious (and pricey) sandwiches. We ate dinner at an Italian restaurant, again the meal wasn’t fantastic.

Our flight wasn’t until 9.30pm on Friday so we went into town to have pastries and coffee for breakfast at a bakery called BUKA. Afterwards we returned to Nyhavn Harbour and took another boat trip but, like most things in life, it wasn’t as enjoyable the second time. Then we headed into town for a look around the shops, a light lunch and an ice-cream. We finished our trip back at the King’s Gardens where my daughter fell asleep on a park bench, a few passers-by gave me very disapproving looks. Then back to our hotel who had arranged our taxi to the airport. Our flight was delayed by an hour or so and we were very pleased to be home when we let ourself in at 1am.

We loved Copenhagen, I had no idea there was so much to do and see. At no point was I worried about pickpockets or phone snatchers and the city is so clean. If you are thinking of taking a solo trip it feels like a very safe destination. Highly recommended!

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

Breakfast at BUKKA bakery

A Trip to Copenhagen – Part One

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

My daughter has been working very long hours at her work placement, and I have not taken any time off since Christmas so we decided to take a five day break, just the two of us. We chose Copenhagen because it supposedly wouldn’t be too hot and there is so much to do and see. I booked through Expedia, we flew out with Norwegian Air, back with Easyjet. There were lots of hotels to choose from and I selected the Ibsens Hotel based on the wonderful reviews and the fact that it is very centrally located. The location was indeed fantastic, within walking distance of almost everywhere you would want to visit, but I wouldn’t stay here again. The rooms are a little basic, a little like a slightly posher Premier Inn or Travel Lodge and the bed linen was very scratchy. Also we had no choice but to open the windows because the room was unbearably hot but then there was noise outside until 2am and some unidentifiable machinery started up every morning at 6.30am. We didn’t have one decent nights sleep for the entire stay. The staff were very helpful though and the room was clean. I did appreciate that they have a luggage room so, after you have checked out, you can lock your cases away and utilise the time before your journey home begins. You can have breakfast at the hotel at the cost of around £25 each but we preferred to eat somewhere different every day. A taxi to the airport cost about £40.

We averaged 24,000 steps every day we were in Copenhagen. Many of the locals use bicycles to get around and crossing the numerous busy roads can feel a little dicey as not everyone stops when they should and you do need to take care not to accidently step into the cycle lane. I saw lots of cyclists scrolling thought their phones while speeding along.

We arrived in the city at around 12pm and, after checking in, we went straight out for lunch at a quirky bookshop/restaurant called Paludan. The food in Copenhagen is extremely expensive, even a simple sandwich picked up at a farmers market will set you back around £15. At Paludan we both had chicken and some vegetables. We then went further into the town and had a look around. If you enjoy shopping, there is everything in Copenhagen from H&M to Hermes. My daughter spotted a couple of shops made famous by Tik Tok and I ended up making a totally unnecessary purchase at Anna August who sell cotton tote bags with snarky phrases or images printed on. I had checked the weather before leaving England and was expecting it to be much cooler but the city was sweltering. I was very pleased to have a sunhat. There are many benches so you can sit and enjoy an ice cream or just people watch. There are also lots of spotlessly clean public loos which are free to use.

Tote bags in Anna August, Reffen Street food market, The famous statue of The Little Mermaid

The next day we visited the famous Nyhavn Harbour which is simply stunning. We had a breakfast of yoghurt, fruit and coffee at a cafe on the side of the harbour known as “The Sunny Side”. The houses are all painted different colours so that drunken sailors could easily find their way home. Hans Christian Anderson lived in one of the houses and apparently wrote The Ugly Duckling after his failed attempt to become a ballet dancer. These nuggets I found out when we took a fabulous hour-long river trip costing only £7 each, probably my favourite part of our stay. After our boat trip we attempted to catch a bus to Reffen, a famous street food market. We weren’t very well prepared for this. We tried to use Apple Pay and then tapped our debit cards onto the scanner while the bus driver and other passengers sat there with a look of contempt. Unhelpfully, there is no information at all on the bus about how you are supposed to pay but my daughter asked another passenger, an American tourist, who said it’s via an app. As there was no signal our attempts to download said app were futile and we ended up unintentionally fare-dodging which was a little stressful but we were more successful on the return journey. If you intend to use public transport then download the DOT and Rejseplanen Apps before you travel. You can buy just about any type of food at Reffen but we had hotdogs which were delicious followed by ice cream. There is a lively atmosphere and, like the rest of Copenhagen, it feels very safe.

After Reffen we went to see an interactive exhibition entitled The Viking Sourceress at The National Museum. There was so much to see here but my feet had had enough for one afternoon so we plodded back to the hotel before going out for dinner at Europa where we waited about an hour for our food which, when it arrived, was dreadful. Then back to the hotel for another noisy, sleepless night.

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

Displays at The National Museum and a poster advertising The Viking Sorceress exhibition

High Street & Amazon Beauty & Fashion Buys – Hits & Misses

On By samanthaIn HEALTHLeave a comment

It’s a sunny Saturday and my daughter and I head into London as she wants to buy some clothes for an upcoming trip she’s making to Milan with some of her university friends. We go to Regent Street which is about a two minute walk from where my daughter is working as an intern. My daughter isn’t the most confident clothes shopper, although she is finding her own style, so wanted to bring me along rather than shop by herself in her five minute lunch break. She is twenty one and athletic, in other words she looks annoyingly good in everything. We went into Hollister and I spotted this oversized striped linen shirt for £29.95 and bought it (for myself) while my daughter tried on a selection of tiny clothing. We then went into Uniqlo where she found some really nice tailored shorts and I bought a black maxi skirt for £34.90. I was tempted by a similar style dress instead but I find I seldom wear the dresses I already own, a skirt is more versatile. I have a few Marks and Spencer classic fit T shirts and will probably wear it with one of those.

We then went into Zara where my daughter looked at vest tops. I bought a bottle of their Radiant Vanilla fragrance. They had a whole range of similar vanilla scents priced at £17.99. I am pleased with this impulse buy, it doesn’t give me a migraine which is always a good start.

When we got home I realised that I hadn’t bought any casual trousers so I ordered these apricot coloured wide leg trousers. from ASOS. If you read my post Wide Leg Woes you might remember that I struggle with anything other than skinny jeans. Anyway, I love these, they fit perfectly, but was extremely irked when they reduced in price by £20 the day after I bought them.

Possibly the most exciting thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life is that I have been invited to join Amazon’s Vine programme. I can order up to three items a day, with no cost to me, as long as I write a review. I was beyond thrilled when I received the invitation email and immediately logged on to my account to choose my first items. So, it’s fair to say that I was a little disappointed at the selection. Tattoo moisturiser and silky bonnets are not really on my wishlist. However, after a ridiculously long time wasted scrolling through the list I ordered a tumeric clay face mask, some under eye patches and a collagen wrap mask, all from brands that I have never heard of . The turmeric face mask was a success, my face felt clean, soft and fresh after using it. The eye patches I did not like at all, they felt slimy and disintegrated on my face. I was wary of leaving the collagen mask on my face all night so tried it one my hands instead to no visible effect. Today I have ordered some luggage tags for my son and some sunglass pouches. As someone who does not like a lot of clutter, this could be a slippery slope.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Saddle Bags – Splurge, Spend or Save?

On By samanthaIn SHOPPINGLeave a comment

Last year I sold what few designer items I owned. I wasn’t using them and they were just taking up space in my wardrobe. My Mulberry bags I sold on a Facebook group, always a bit risky but I insisted on using PayPal Goods & Services and I sold some small leather goods on eBay. I was particularly fortunate in selling a Chanel wallet because I was sure nobody would want a huge purse anymore but I kept an eye on the Chanel buying and selling Facebook page and, by a stroke of luck, somebody was on the lookout for the exact same one. I manged to recoup almost all of my money.

So, I actually do now need a new bag. I have been using a Mulberry Anthony lookalike from Marks and Spencer but it is looking a little tatty now and I don’t like the style enough to splash out on the designer version, it’s a little masculine for me. After some online perusing I decided I’d like a saddle bag style and the Mulberry Pimlico Satchel in Black Cherry caught my eye. I managed to order it over the phone from their outlet store in Bicester for £416. When the bag arrived it was absolutely beautiful but the calf leather looked like it would scratch very easily and that’s no good for me so I reluctantly returned it. I started searching online for different options and there are many! If you happen to have won the lottery you could treat yourself to Dior’s iconic and very beautiful Saddle bag which costs £3,340. Chloe sell a style called Marcie which is very pretty at a hefty £1,490.

Then I found myself becoming engrossed in the Netflix romantic comedy Nobody Wants This with Kristen Bell and Adam Brody. Bell plays Joanne, a blonde atheist who falls in love with a Rabbi. Joanne’s wardrobe is just gorgeous, although sadly too young for me, and I spotted this Claude bag from French fashion company Sezane. Still a fairly hefty price tag of £345 but the quality looks good and it comes in different types of leather. I popped into the Sezane store in Marylebone where there were lots of bags on display but I didn’t like any of them enough to make a purchase.

During a recent stroll around Covent Garden I popped into a branch of The Cambridge Satchel Company to escape the cold. They have a small collection devoted to the Wicked movie but they also have this attractive, if slightly bulky, style called The Kate for £250. They stock another quite minimalist style, simply called The Saddle Bag for £130. Barbour sell something similar, a style called Laire, in two different sizes starting at £89.95.

Next stock this non-leather bugundy saddle bag for just £34. I think it looks almost as nice at the far more expensive options although not the Dior obviously. It also comes in black. Similarly priced at £39.50 is this glossy black bag from Marks and Spencer.

I visited Hoopers department Store in lovely Tunbridge Wells where a display of bags (featured in my header photo) made by Campamaggi caught my eye. Soft, burnished leather and decorated with rivets and lacing, they retail at around £350. Also on display were the classic Longchamp Epure bags at £295. So, far too much choice for me to be able to make a decision as usual. I headed home and later on saw a Facebook advertisement for the DeMellier sale. There was a very pretty style called the Mini Venice featured at £298. In a rare moment of decisiveness I ordered one in the colour Berry, the last one in stock according to the website. I am delighted with my purchase which came beautifully boxed. The strap is a great length, the bag holds my purse, phone, keys, glasses and a small make up bag. It also has a top handle for more formal occasions. My search is over!

Thank you for reading,

Samantha

My DeMellier Mini Venice bag featured in the middle photo flanked by Longchamp Le Foulonne and Epure bags.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

Budget Beauty Buys – Hits & Misses

On By samanthaIn HEALTHLeave a comment

I am at that age where I need to start taking action to prevent crepey skin on my body, in fact I probably should have begun some years ago but I have never liked using body lotion. I have noticed the sagging, wrinkled effect beginning on so many people, especially their arms and chest and it isn’t attractive but then, what part of aging is? I remember my beautiful Godmother, Josephine, complaining about her skin beginning to look wrinkled when she was eighty five but sadly I don’t have her amazing genes.

I moisturise my face and neck twice a day without fail and have done since my late teens. Sometimes I splash out and treat myself to something fancy from Chanel or Clarins but, more often than not, I will pick up a jar of something in the supermarket, Nivea Q10 or Olay. I noticed that Boots No 7 had an offer on so I ordered their Lift and Luminate gift set for £62.95. The set comprises of face oil, day and night creams and face and eye serums. I have enjoyed all the products apart from the face serum which leaves a blue, glittery sheen on my face. I will definitely repurchase the eye serum. The face oil smells gorgeous and just two tiny drops leaves my face looking hydrated and a little bit glowy. Have any of these potions made a visible difference to any signs of aging – no, but they have kept my face feeling soft, they smell nice and have represented good value for money.

I have been using the same face wash for years, Nivea Gentle Cleansing Cream Wash but it seemed to be out of stock everywhere recently so, on a visit to Tesco I picked up some L’Oreal Hyaluron Expert Wash but within two days of using it I had red, sore patches under my nose and between my brows. I don’t have particularly sensitive skin but this seems to be too strong. Maybe it would be a winner for someone with oily skin.

For my body I bought Garnier Nourishing Ceramide Body Butter which was on offer for about £5, it has a vanilla fragrance. I liked this product so much that I also bought Garnier Vitamin C Nutri Glow Body Cream in a mango scent which literally smells good enough to eat. I can’t recommend these well priced products enough, they are very effective at moisturising even the driest patches

My nails are, to be quite honest, rather a disgrace. Apart from before my wedding, I have never had a professional manicure in my life. Firstly all the young people working in these places (and there are so many nail bars in my town) seem to be from Vietnam and I worry that they are being trafficked. Also, professional nail upkeep is so expensive and time consuming. I might give them a quick file when one of them breaks but that’s about the extent of my maintenance. I do always polish my toenails in the summer though in an attempt to spruce up my hideous feet. I bought myself some Essie gel polish in a lilac shade called Strut with it. The polish and gel top coat are both £11. You can usually expect your gel manicure to last about ten days. I have tried the cheaper D-i-Y gel polishes but Essie does seem to be the best. I also recommend Mavala nail polishes, they do a beautiful icy pink shade called Glacier, perfect for toenails. I used to wear their deep burgundy shade called Las Vegas in my twenties and they still sell it thirty years later. At £6.40 it is a great alternative to Chanel’s iconic Rouge Noir.

So some great, reasonably priced beauty buys. I think just slowing down and taking the time to induge in a little self care is very important and it doesn’t really matter if the products you are using cost £50 or £5. In fact, I’m sure some of the cheaper options are just as effective.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

A Day Out in Kent – Lullingstone Castle and The World Garden

On By samanthaIn GOING OUTLeave a comment

A lovely friend of mine has just visited from Australia. She had an impossibly busy schedule but we agreed to meet on Saturday. She was staying at the Premier Inn in my town so I picked her up and we decided to visit Lullingstone Castle and its “World Garden” .

If you decide to visit Lullingstone don’t do the logical thing and follow the signs for the castle, they will simply take you to a pair of locked gates. You have to head for Lullingstone Roman Villa and then you drive behind the visitor centre and the castle will be revealed in all its beauty. It really is like a scene from Brideshead Revisited. There was even a vintage Rolls Royce parked outside. To visit the house and garden costs a very reasonable £12.50 for adults. There are concessions for OAPs and children.

Both Henry VIII and Queen Anne are known to have been regular visitors to the castle which now comprises of a manor house, gate house, church and a stunning lake. Inside the house you can see one of Queen Anne’s hair pieces along with other historical objects. There are lots of models of the castle on display and a friendly volunteer to answer any questions. The current owner, whose family have owned Lullingstone since 1497, warmly greeted us at the door and chatted to my friend about her own travels. I did wonder if owning such a huge property is as much of a burden as it is a blessing. The upkeep must be enormous.

On the grounds, as you enter through the gatehouse there is St Botolph’s church, of Norman origin and made of flint, which boasts some of the oldest stained glass windows in the world, some from the fourteenth century. Although it is small there is plenty to see inside.

If you have heard of the castle before it may because of the BBC series Save Lullingstone Castle, and Return to Lullingstone Castle or because the son of the owners, Tom Hart Dyke was kidnapped in the Panamanian jungle during an expedition in the year 2000. He and his companions were held for nine months. Thankfully they were eventually released and I remember seeing him on a talk show after his ordeal was over. He has gone on to have a successful career in botany and, whilst in captivity, came up with the idea for the World Garden at Lullingstone. As the name suggests, the garden takes visitors on a botanical tour of the world and is really very quirky and charming. There are lots of unusual plants to see, some sculptures and a touch of kitsch here and there, like the pair of plastic penguins either side of an entry way.

The castle has a cafe where “light refreshments” are served and guests are also permitted to bring their own picnic. There is a gift shop and a nursery so that you can purchase some plants of your own. I thought Lullingstone was really lovely and I will definitely be back again, next time I will visit the Roman Villa as well.

After the castle we decided to go to for a pub lunch. We drove to a nearby village and had possibly the worst meal out I’ve ever experienced. The manager was so rude and unhelpful when my friend asked a question about the menu. I ordered a burger which was served with some sort of sloppy meat on the side. There was literally no service apart from the lad who brought our plates over but a 12.5% service charge was added to the bill. We went to the bar for drinks and ordered from a QR code, something I am wary about after a friend’s husband fell victim to a scam where a fake code was stuck onto a menu. Anyway I won’t name the pub which may be in the most picturesque location but I certainly won’t be returning.

Thank you for reading

Samantha

The Dementia Diaries – Chapter Seventeen, The Care Agency

On By samanthaIn THE DEMENTIA DIARIESLeave a comment

Dad and I looked at the list of care agencies given to us by the visitor from Social Services. Most of them were located more than fifteen miles away. There is a local agency but I did not want to use them because I have seen one of their carers in the local park screaming abuse at somebody. Dad rang Age UK and they recommended some other agencies and we booked an initial meeting with one of these.

Two women arrived from the agency, one manager and a young woman who seemed to be learning the ropes. They arrived at 12pm and Mum would always be up by then but, on this particular day she had gone back to bed after breakfast saying that she felt unwell. Never in my life before have I known Mum to be in bed at midday. Anyway the older manager was very much into cross selling her company’s services. I explained that Dad is not going to pay almost forty pounds an hour for cleaning and she was visibly disappointed. I explained that we were considering booking a couple of initial sessions where the carer would come in and bathe Mum and wash her hair. The manager started pushing for every day. I was glad I had attended because I can see how elderly people can be pressured into agreeing to more of the care agency’s time than they can really afford.

I explained that Mum would usually be up at this time but she was feeling unwell. The manager asked to see her and, again I reiterated that Mum was asleep. “Just let me see her” she said. I took the manager and her colleague upstairs and into Mum and Dad’s bedroom. Mum was lying on her back, fast asleep looking white as a sheet The manager called Mum’s name in a booming voice, scaring her. Mum became very distressed. If I was woken by two strangers in my bedroom I would be terrified, anyone would. I went over and reassured Mum who was overjoyed to see me for once. Then the manager said it is neglectful to leave Mum in bed all day. For the third time I explained that Mum is NEVER in bed all day , I began to feel really annoyed and judged. The manager then said that their carer would wash Mum but wouldn’t be prepared to manoeuvre her into the bath. I said would write to the contact at Social Service and see if we could have a bath chair. This was supposed to have been supplied before. Everything is such hard work.

Despite my misgivings, Dad seemed keen on booking them in so we arranged for two visits the following week. The manager said she had a particularly kind, patient carer in mind. I was working on the day she visited but rang Dad once I had finished, he sound exhausted and exasperated, predictably Mum had refused to be washed. The carer made Mum a cup of tea and left, Dad said she seemed very nice and patient. Later that evening Dad rang me and said mum was crying. I popped round and Mum said her back hurt, I gave her some pain killers and tried to straighten up the cushions on her chair but she wouldn’t let me. She told me to go home and leave her alone. Dad asked me to help with a problem on his computer, we were out of the room five minutes and Mum must have shouted out, demanding dinner, at least fifteen times.

I woke at 4am this morning worrying. Mum is clearly not cleaning herself and she will not allow anyone else to help. What on Earth are we going to do? She could have a bottom covered in sores but we wouldn’t know. What if we need to call an ambulance or doctor out, they will think we have not been looking after her. The same carer is coming again in a couple of days and we will try again but I am not optimistic. I think we are going to have to consider a care home if this refusal continues.

Samantha

Cover Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash